For the Ice Cream Connoisseur

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

I recently came across a nifty infographic, made by VanMonster, that details the evolution of the ice cream van. As an ice cream connoisseur, this was super interesting to me. I’ve thought a lot about the evolution of ice cream, but not the mode in which it was delivered to me as a child—the van with the ever-playing jingle. Enjoy the infographic.

Did you learn something new from this infograph? If so, post below!

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Photo courtesy of http://www.vanmonster.com/

Have You Found What You’re Looking For?

Photo courtesy of elitetrack.com

Photo courtesy of elitetrack.com

A while back, I read this post over at Radio Silencer. It’s so funny what people look up…and how it all can somehow lead to your blog.

When I look at the search terms now, I mostly see “unknown search terms.” Boring! So this post is dedicated to the good ‘ole days when I could see what hilarity led people to my blog:

  • Presidential badassery – …I…what? I mean, it seems like two words that don’t necessarily go together, unless you are referring to Ronald Regan riding a velociraptor. Then that all makes sense.
  • Distomance – A fun word that combines dystopia and romance. And I did write about Divergent, so yeah, this one makes sense.
  • Joe Weil poems – Another that’s reasonable. I have read a poem by Joe Weil on this blog.
  • комиксы predator – I can’t even. A Russian predator? As in, Predator wearing a fuzzy black hat and kicking out his feet to folk tunes? Now that I can get behind.
  • My 2014 new year – Another one that makes sense. My resolutions posts usually get good traffic.
  • Wesley Mcnair – *shoulder shrug*
  • Barefoot business – Ah yes, always be businessing…barefoot, if possible.
  • Dr Who and Jesus – Did I write a post comparing Jesus to Doctor Who (the tenth to be exact)? Yes, I did. You’re welcome.
  • How tall is Rachel Frederickson – I weighed in (see what I did there?) on this controversy because people bashed her because she was thin. I know that feels. Apparently many other people wanted opinions on this as well.
  • Dear Sister AK Press – I end on one I’m the most proud of because it was a huge step for me in a lot of ways not only to send my work to the Dear Sister anthology, but also to be published alongside some great artists.

 

What are some odd search terms that have led to your blog? Or what are random search terms you’ve entered?

If We Were Having Coffee…

A few days ago, I saw this post from Jamie over at Perpetual Page Turner. I thought, “What a super cool idea!” I love that, as a blogger, I can interact with my followers in a more personal way. So, I decided to follow suit and write my own “If We Were Having Coffee” post (thought I enjoy hot chocolate more. But, well, “If We Were Having Coffee” is a way more attractive blog post title than “If We Were Each Partaking in Our Warm Beverages of Choice”).

I've got my cocoa and cinnamon! And why yes, that is Katniss Everdeen behind me.

I’ve got my cocoa and cinnamon! And why yes, that is Katniss Everdeen behind me.

Here’s the idea: I share what’s going on with me right now with you, the reader, as if we were sitting together, cozy and sharing life over warm mugs 🙂 I’m going to ask you questions too, so feel free to respond via comment or e-mail (roaringout (at) gmail (dot) com). So grab a mug of your warm beverage of choice (hmm, maybe that alternate blog title would work…) and join me:

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I much prefer hot chocolate with cinnamon.

I’d ask you what your favorite warm beverage is.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I felt like the absolute worst teacher yesterday. I was caught in horrendous traffic with no way of getting in touch with my 8 am class. I arrived 20 minutes late, and my students had understandably left (our classroom is locked and I’m the only one who can open it). They did leave a note with the names of all who were present, which was responsible of them. I felt like “such a fucking failure” (to quote myself from a 10-minute freewrite I did during class time since no students were present). I harp on my students to be on time and to not waste my time, their time, or their fellow classmates’ time, yet that’s exactly what I did, though not intentionally. Even after I e-mailed the class to explain, I felt like it was not enough.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I also practiced being kind to myself yesterday. Everyone makes mistakes. The semester is a month in, and I’ve extended grace to many of my students. I shouldn’t feel ashamed to ask for a bit of grace as well.

I’d ask you about a time when you felt bad, but learned to practice being kind to yourself.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I’m super excited, though nervous, about selling my art at a local craft fair on Sunday. I’ve still got a bunch of prep to do, but it also means that I know I’ll prioritize fun, crafty work!

I’d ask you what opportunities are you excited about. What risks, however small or great, are you taking?

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you I’m also super excited yet nervous about getting married next month. I love that I get to spend the rest of my life with the most amazing man in the universe (I may or may not be biased…), but, oh boy, weddings are a lot of work! I’ve got most things under control, I just don’t like planning for long-term projects. I know everything will be worth it the day of; I just have to keep reminding myself of this fact.

I’d ask you to tell me about a time when you were nervous, but everything turned out OK.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I’m a bit frustrated with myself for not making more “me” time; that is, time to write, to be crafty, to read, to do things that I love.

I’d ask you what you like to do during “me” time. I’d also ask how you make time for the things you love to do, as opposed to the things you have to do.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I’m so excited about fall TV lineups starting again. I love so many shows (Supernatural and Walking Dead, anyone?) that I can barely keep track!

I’d ask you what your favorite fall shows are.

OK, I think that’s good for now. Your turn! Feel free to respond in the comments or via e-mail to me. I’m looking forward to your side of the conversation 🙂

You Like Me. You Really Like Me!

Photo courtesy of 101fundraising.org

Photo courtesy of 101fundraising.org

So back in 2011 and 2012, I was nominated for the Versatile Blogger Award by two bloggers. I responded to both of them, saying that I was honored they thought to give me this award. That’s the good part. The bad part is that it’s taken me the better part of two years to actually getting around to what the award entails.

First off, thank you PoeticJourney and Write, Wrong, and Everything In Between for nominating me for this!

Second, I’m supposed to list 15 blogs I like/regularly follow. I don’t know that I regularly follow that many, but here are a few I really like and regularly comment on:

Don Miller’s Storyline Blog

Tara Anderson’s The Librarian Who Doesn’t Say Shh!

Sarah Clare’s Behind on Books

Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half

Dave Williams’s Zooky World

(5 out of 15 ain’t bad, right?)

Lastly, I need to list 7 things about myself:

1. I think I overuse the word “anyhoo” when I write. I know I overuse the word “awesome” when I talk AND write.

2. When I was little, I wanted to be a mermaid when I grew up. I still do….

3. I think proper grammar is sexy (this includes the serial comma).

4. I’m a big sci fi nerd. Doctor Who, Battlestar Galactica, Farscape, Supernatural. Love it! (Haven’t gotten to Stargate yet, but I will.)

5. I hadn’t seen the movie The Goonies until last year (Stop judging me! I feel those stares…)

6. I love ice cream and milkshakes.

7. After some years of denial, I must admit that red is my favorite color, followed closely by midnight blue and black.

Thanks again for the award! Now ends my acceptance speech.

The Upside of Grading: Funny Student Typos

Sorry for the crappy quality, but I have to make sure I don't show students' names.

Sorry for the crappy quality, but I have to make sure I don’t show students’ names.

As a professor, one of my main duties is grading papers. With five classes, that averages to about 100 hundred papers, give or take, for any assignment. While I love reading student responses, grading and slogging through the slush pile is exhausting and can be tedious (and sometimes a little painful). I realized I needed to make it more fun somehow. So, I started tweeting funny typos (with the number of papers I grade, they happen often!). After tweeting them for about two months, I figured, “Why not share them with my blog audience as well?”

So sit back, relax, and laugh:

“The family charges everyone that came to see him, which leads Pelayo and his wife to become extremely wife.” (How do you become extremely wife? Is it like being Betty Crocker?)

“He looked like a normal man without any freaky fetuses, but ended up being a necrophiliac.” (I probably laughed for five minutes after reading this one. By the by, this is a response to Neil Gaiman’s Snow, Glass, Apples, in case anyone was curious why fetishes—umm, I mean fetuses—were brought up.)

“The two fictional short stories…are two great stories to compare life lesions.” (That’s an unpleasant visual…)

“She goes and buys some men supplies and arsenic.” (…what are men supplies?)

“She lacked quilt…[because] she will kill again.”

“Behavior also has a hug role in the case of a serial killer.” (The softer side of serial killers.)

“They’re people we call our family, friends, and collages.”

“…Garcia Marquez makes the readers question if the old man is really an angle or not.” (The real question is if the old man is really obtuse or acute.)

“I literately have given up sleep to watch Dexter.” (Giving up sleep poetically? I’ve done that.)

OK, I couldn’t just end the blog with typos. Every now and then, students are really freaking awesome and say things I just have to document. So to end the blog, here are a few amazing student quotes (that were typo free!):

“Without fiction, life would be plain and to the point. Nothing creative and magical would exist.”

“Poetry is pretty darn cool. It’s like drawing with words.”

“Just because you guys both like listening to The Smiths and eating Razzles on a Friday night does not mean you have found ‘the one.'” (This one is probably my favorite!)

Conversation with a student, in which the student is trying to understand the “Significance” section of a research proposal:
Student: Say I’m writing about the difference between peanut butter and jelly. Is the “Significance” part where I would say that peanut butter is better than jelly?
Me: Yes, it would also be where you state why knowing that peanut butter is better than jelly would be helpful for the sandwich field.

Want to keep up with the hilarity/awesomeness of my student’s typos? Follow me on Twitter and Facebook!

One Second Every Day – February

Here’s the second month of my One Second Every Day project. This month includes my trip to Philly, lots of sleeping, and my roommate using our vacuum cleaner to make a point.

The song in the video is the acoustic version of Hanson’s “Mmmbop.”

(Curious as to what this project is all about? See the first post.)

10 Lessons I Learned from Teaching

English: Sahab Library

English: Sahab Library (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’s five days until Christmas, and while most people are thinking of presents and family, I’m rejoicing that my finals grades are in!

This semester was both the hardest and most rewarding for me. I taught five classes at two different colleges. It was a juggling act, and the past four months have felt like a crash course in time management and interpersonal relations. Now that I can look back in retrospect, it was totally worth it (in fact, I’m teaching five courses again next semester).

As with all experiences, I’ve learned a lot this semester, which marks my year and a half of teaching.  Here are the top points:

1. Be specific – Students forget things. Students can be dense. And you have to remember that this is, most likely, not a student’s only class.  There’s a lot to keep track of for both you and your lovely horde of 18 year olds, so make it easier on yourself and be specific. Let them know exactly what’s expected. If they break the rules, most will be good at admitting it. And be prepared to repeat yourself…a lot.

2. Know your students and yourself – One of my main goals at the beginning of the semester is to get every one of my student’s names down.  Knowing them makes students feel like you care (and makes it easier to call them out when they’re being silly 😉 ). As the semester goes on, you also get to know your students, their limits, and your limits. You’ll know which students try to get away with murder and which are just having a bad week. And you know when you just can’t accept another late paper because if you have to grade one more grammar-mistake-riddled assignment, you might just run screaming from the building.

3. It’s not you, it’s…no, it’s you – Some students (no matter how hard you try) just won’t give a shit.  Don’t take it personally. Pour your heart and resources into those who do care and who will listen to you.

4. Sometimes, you just have to commiserate – This might sound callous, but after a hard day of not one student listening/understanding you or a lesson plan flopping or a hard night of grading, you just need to sit in the teacher’s lounge and blow off some steam with colleagues. Sometimes, those you teach with turn out to be the best therapists and problem solvers.

5. Most likely, you study harder than quite a few of your students – I know I do. And it gets frustrating. “You mean I spent three hours prepping for this lesson with an additional three hours to catch up on grading, and you didn’t even take fifteen minutes to read the three-page essay for today?” Yeah, it happens. But you keep on trying your best. (See point 3).

English: The main reading romm of Graz Univers...

6. No one told me there’d be a paper party – I knew there’d be lesson planning and grading, but paperwork? I find myself constantly putting reams of forms in the “interoffice mail” bin. Am I exaggerating? Perhaps. Will my description feel spot on if you are a teacher? Yes.

7. No one gets into teaching for the grading – I love being in front of the classroom. I love hearing what my students have to say. I even (usually) love reading what they have to say. But evaluating it all? Not so much. Though I do have to say that www.engrade.com makes my life infinitely easier by calculating all my grades. It’s a wonderful free resource (Hint for all my fellow teachers!). Hey, I’m an English professor. You do the math 😉

8. Teaching is like a zombie (it wants your brains) – Hours of lesson planning and grading can be all consuming. You will emerge from a long night of this and only be able to communicate using unintelligible grunts. Which brings me to number 9…

9. Be kind to yourself – Not all classes will be winners (i’m speaking of lesson plans here, not students). Some days, it will feel like all the work you are putting in is futile. Don’t beat yourself up, and, most importantly, take “you” time (because you will get burnt out). Take a weeknight or a weekend for yourself. Put the folder of papers and stacks of books away, get a bowl of ice cream, and marathon your favorite show (if you’re feeling particularly adventurous, go outside, see the sun, and, perhaps, even have a drink or two). Students can wait another few days to get a paper back. They really won’t mind, and they’ll appreciate having a well-rested, good-humored professor to show for it.

10. You get around to some students, even if it takes a while – I know I’ve griped quite a bit about students not listening or turning in assignments late. Every job has it’s rough moments. I got into teaching because I love it. I love diving into literature texts and discussing the serial comma. I love having discussions and answering students’ questions.

I love it even more when students answer each other’s questions, showing me that they “get” it. I love it even more when a student who only wrote in sentence fragments at the beginning of the semester can now making a cohesive argument. I love it even more when I get an e-mail from a student telling me that I made English bearable and even a little fun. That is why I do what I do—for even, just a moment, to show them the power of the written word. It sounds like some idealistic notion out of a work of fiction, but it does happen…and, for me, it makes the journey worth it.

If you teach, what wisdom do you have to share?  If you are (or have been) a student, what do you wish teachers knew?

Kicking the Bucket: Things I’d Like to Do Before I Die

As I mentioned in yesterday’s post, this is the second article on the theme of bucket lists.  I  found my list a little overwhelming, so I broke it up into age categories to make it a little more manageable (at least in my mind!).  Here are a list of things I would love to do before I hit certain ages.
Hot Air Balloon

Hot Air Balloon (Photo credit: Eric Lim Photography)

Before 30
  • Act in an off-Broadway play
  • Build my own study/studio (I love books and art and wide open spaces.  For more of an idea of what I mean, check out the Pinterest photo album I’ve dedicated to this dream.)
  • Get my first tattoo
  • Get my motorcycle license
  • Get tattooed with my mom (We’ve had a sort of pact that we’d both get tattooed on her 50th birthday, which is fast approaching.  I guess I should think up a design…)
  • Go rock climbing
  • Go skinny dipping
  • Have a picnic in Central park (basket, wine, the works!)
  • Have coffee (or hot chocolate) with Don Miller (I know the saying goes, “Never meet your heroes.”  I’m willing to take the hit on this one.)
  • Learn to play guitar proficiently (I define this as being able to read the music and pick up the tune easily.  I’ve started taking guitar classes, so I’m on my way!)
  • Learn to use a sewing machine
  • Make Cheetara costume (as you’ll see in tomorrow’s post, I’ve dressed up for conventions a few times.  I want to go with a few people to a convention as the Thundercats at some point.)
  • Ride a zip line
  • Run a successful Etsy shop (I define this as 5 or more sales per month in both Roaring Out and Lady Velociraptor)
  • See a Broadway musical (My mom took me to one when I was a baby, so that doesn’t really count)
  • Take a dance class
  • Take a hot air balloon ride
  • Take a road trip where the only parameter is to get back home before I run out of money
  • Take part in a writing residency
  • Try frisbee golf
  • Visit Portland, Oregon
  • Visit Spain
  • Write a fan letter to Jason Statham and see if he responds
flamer

flamer (Photo credit: olaerik)

Before 35

  • Adopt a chimp
  • Fly an airplane
  • Get married
  • Go on a missions trip
  • Gut a fish
  • Have my photography published in a magazine or book
  • Have one or two kids
  • Have publication credits from at least 10 different lit mags
  • Make my own beer
  • Publish my first book
  • Raise $5,000 to drill a well with LiquidWater.com
  • Swing from a chandelier
  • Take a hot air balloon ride
  • Travel to Israel
  • Try blowing glass or working with hot glass
  • Visit Montreal
  • Visit the Globe Theatre in London
  • Walk away from an explosion in slow motion (like the movies!  or Gangnam style)
Flamenco culture is native to Andalusia.

Flamenco culture is native to Andalusia. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Before 40

  • Be in a band
  • Be in at least one episode of a favorite TV show of mine (preferably Dr Who, but I’d be cool with Supernatural, too)
  • Flamenco dance in Spain
  • Maintain a regular exercise routine (not necessarily go to the gym, but maybe still spar and such)
  • Make my own wine in Napa Valley
  • Read a book a week and write a review for each (I finished a 25 @ 25 photo challenge earlier in the year.  Perhaps I can do a 40 @ 40 book review challenge…)
  • Read at a Poetry reading where I am the headliner
  • Ride a gondola in Italy
  • Swim with dolphins
  • Visit all 50 states (alternately, have sex in all 50 states. A friend of mine mentioned that she had done this and it sounded like a fun, unique challenge 😉 )
Laurel wreath

Laurel wreath (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Before 50
  • Become Poet Laureate of the state I’m currently living in
  • Make a habit of traveling abroad each year

I must give credit where credit is due.  I would not have written out a bucket list were it not for the blogs of these two lovely ladies: Lesley Carter and Julie

Check out their blogs.  They do some pretty incredible stuff 🙂

What is one item on your bucket list?

Simple Question. A Myriad of Possibilities: A Book Review

MOST INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD

MOST INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD (Photo credit: roberthuffstutter)

I don’t always publish posts in a series, but when I do, I like them to have a theme.

I thought it would be appropriate to begin the new year by publishing three posts that have to do with bucket lists. A while back, I found two blogs that published their bucket lists. I wrote down mine, and they have sat as drafts in my WordPress account for far too long. I’ll be unleashing the goods later this week.

Photo courtesy of Amazon.com

Photo courtesy of Amazon.com

I’ll start with a book review. Some of the best books I find while randomly browsing library shelves.  A few months ago I browsed the “New Book” shelf at the library and found “What Do You Want to Do Before You Die?”  The cover intrigued me, and I found myself not really knowing how to answer this question because so many ideas came to mind.

It turns out that this book came about because four guys, who named themselves “The Buried Life,” became dissatisfied with how their lives were going (graduate college, get a 9-5 job, etc).  They decided to forge their own road and go on a road trip armed with a list of 100 bucket list items.  This trip turned into a movement. Everywhere they went, they not only tried to cross off items on their list, but also on the lists of strangers they met.  They’ve asked countless people “What do you want to do before you die?” and the answers are by turns comical, outlandish, and heart-warming.

The Buried Life

The Buried Life (Photo credit: University of Central Arkansas)

The book is a mix of Buried Life testimonials giving account about how these four guys have achieved their own bucket list items as well as how they helped others achieve something of their own.  Some accounts are directly from people they have helped.  But what I found most interesting is that most of the book’s pages are comprised of collages illustrating a single bucket list wish.  Pages and pages are filled with wishes, both extravagant and simple, rendered in a very quirky ways.  I loved flipping through this book again and again just to look at the artwork.  A few of these wishes have even made it onto my bucket list because they sound like so much fun.

This book is a fairly quick read, but  it’s so rich.  I’d recommend this book for anyone looking for inspiration, both personally and creatively.

Following My Fez Instinct

As mentioned in my previous post, I had a hankering to draw my house-crushing bowtie with a fez.  My friend, Cara, nudged me in this direction, so here you have it (I even added the sky)!

I didn’t forget about the pterodactyl wings:

Since my last post had a post script, I thought I’d include one here to:

Cara (yes, the very Cara who nudged me toward this post) has a book out called Counting with Cats Who Dream.  Click here to check it out!

I’m not that funny…

When I first started this blog, I didn’t have a clear vision for it.  I still don’t.  All I knew and still know is that I love to write and want a space for my random thoughts.  I really admire funny blogs, like Hyperbole and a Half and Second Lunch.  For a while, I tried to write like them in posts/e-mails/etc.  And it just didn’t work.  But I think I’ve come to the conclusion that just because I can’t really wit in the blogosphere, I can still add something valuable to the internet discussion, like this poorly rendered drawing of a bowtie attempting to smash a house:

Why yes, that house’s door is TARDIS blue, thanks for noticing 🙂

And yes, I can draw a straight line.  Just not in MS paint.  I also signed this masterpiece in the corner…like a boss (or a nerd. Either way, really).

For some reason, the bowtie’s head reminds me of a pterodactyl.  I should make another version of this drawing with huge wings on the bowtie….and a fez. (Update: those drawings can now be found here!)

Also, while tagging this post, WordPress suggested “blissdom” and I couldn’t resist.  It sounds so cool, like being in a dome of bliss.  What would that even look like?  I think it would be blue.

I changed my blog’s theme about a week ago to the snazzy one you see before you.  I thought it looked professional and modern with the pictures of nature and whatnot.  This post made you unsee all of that legitimacy, didn’t it?  Well poop…if you come back, I promise to be insightful at some point.  Here’s a think-y face to prove it /-{  <—– me with my eyes closed (crookedly) and my lips pursed in deep thought.

I really should have called this “Post Scripts, the Blog Post”

In Search of Joy Rays

Late last year, I submitted a few poems to a literary journal that was having a “Buy a Book, Save a Bookstore” challenge.  The journal wanted submitters to include a receipt of a recently purchased book along with their submission.  The goal was to support local bookstores in an age where e-books tend to trump the printed word.  Submitters could also include documentation (tweets, pictures, etc.).

I decided to document my bookstore trip a la Hyperbole and a Half.  For those of you who are unfamiliar with the work of Allie Brosh’s wonderful blog, click here.  It will be the best decision of your life.  She depicts stories from her life in the form of MS Paint drawings.  I thought that was a cool idea and I wanted to do the same (disclaimer: Allie has a much better sense of perspective and shading than I do).  Here is my rendering of my trip to Borders in search of the perfect book:

After walking into the bookstore, I sauntered over to the poetry section.  I got down on my knees.  I felt this was most appropriate not only because it felt like I was working hard to find a book, but also since the right book is usually found at kneeling eye-level (I think there was also some subconscious reverence going on).  From the vantage point of this picture, you can’t see what I see.  Let me show you…

This is a Michelle’s eye-view of one of the poetry section (I’m not entirely sure why I made the carpet green.  Perhaps it reminded me of a park or grassy meadow that I wanted to read my soon-to-be-purchased book in).  It was small, but there was quite a bit of variety…not to mention the start of the Philosophy section on the very last shelf!

Here is a closer look at one particular shelf.  It was a bit messy.  I’m not knocking the fact that the books were out of order; I work at a library and know how that goes.  It just made the process of finding the right book a little more challenging (and sometimes amusing).  I’ve given each book a number and a description below:

1. a book by T. S. Eliot

2. a Billy Collins book

3. a slightly thicker Billy Collins book

4. yet another Billy Collins book (either he’s prolific or this store really digs his verse)

5. a book written by another Billy. Billy Corgan to be precise (no, I’m not joking.  The Smashing Pumpkins front man has a legit published poetry collection)

6. the essential Pablo Neruda

7. the collected works of Sylvia Plath

8. a book by a poet I hadn’t heard of before, but am certain belonged on that shelf alphabetically

9. a misplaced DVD

When I saw that Billy Corgan had a book of poetry, I was confused, intrigued, and (according to this drawing) slightly angry.  My eyes also grew to four times their normal size.

After a few minutes of searching, one book finally caught my eye with its joy rays.  This often happens when ones eyes land upon the perfect book.  In my case, it was Terrance Haye’s “Lighthead.”

After finding “Lighthead,” I got in line.  Since it was a few days before Christmas, the line was very long. But I had my book, so I was happy.

Trips to the bookstore often mean a bit of searching, some frustration, and a smattering of amusement.  But in the end, there is the joy of the printed word!

Always Be Businessing

Recently, I discovered the wonder that is Business Bonesaw.  This man (THE man, actually) talks about his secrets to success.  These include already being rich and appearing via satellite as often as possible.  Sound advice, sir.

As someone who is fairly new to the career world, I took his advice to heart, particularly his number one maxim–ABB, Always Be Businessing.  So I do.  I business at work, at home, and on my newly purchased yacht (I call her “Your Boat Can Sail in My Yacht’s Pool 7.”  I also own 1 – 6).  I get things done.

So, remember, you can’t be a business success unless you ABB (even on your day off whilst barefoot and in a sun dress).

I've been bonesawed!

Want to Know If You’re Fashion Saavy? Ask My Male, Straight, Colorblind Roommate

This is Fletcher:

As you can see from the picture, Fletcher likes shiny things.  Fletcher also has a pension for sharp objects and fire.  Fletcher and I are roommates.

We had a discussion a little while back about fashion.  I walked into the apartment with a pair of boots whose heels had shattered.  The bottoms had completely fallen apart and the only reason I could still walk in them was because it was winter and snow had frozen inside the broken heels.  I mentioned to Fletcher that I needed a new pair of black boots and he asked, “Why?”  I told him that the heels were broken.

End of discussion, right?  Nope.

Fletcher went off on this comical rant about how ice-heeled boots were all the winter rage.  He paced, he kind of raised his voice, he pointed his index finger!  I told him the shoes wouldn’t be so fancy when they melted, to which he replied that all I needed to do was stick them in the freezer all night, every night.

Since Fletcher’s wardrobe tends toward the denim and t-shirt camp, I questioned his fervor on the ice-heels.  How could he possibly speak with authority when he didn’t pay any attention to fashion (not to mention the fact that he’s colorblind, which can be a nightmare when trying to coordinate an outfit…or so I’ve heard)?

His answer?  “Since I’m straight I look at a lot of women, so I know what looks good on them.”  I couldn’t argue with that logic.

So if you really want to know if your fashion sense is up to speed, ask my male, straight, colorblind roommate (who sometimes poses for silly pictures):

Gonna Climb This Bean to the Moon Somehow!


I figured it was about time for another Christmas bean update.  As you can see from the pictures, he has grown pretty massive and unwieldy.  He’s grown a healthy set of leaves and I suspect I’ll have to find another home for this little guy (ok, not so little) soon.  In the meantime, Christmas bean adds a nice accent to the floral print paper towels.